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The Grinch tells All!!!

December 22, 2021

The Grinch tells All!!!

1. How did you come about living on top of Mount Crumpit?
I had a horrible real estate agent… DO YOU HEAR ME KAREN!!! YOU’LL PAY!!!

2. When and how did you and Max the Dog come to be together? Would you consider each other friends?
I consider Max a stalker! He just followed me home one day and never left.

3. Why do you think Max the Dog is so loyal to you?
Poor judge of character!

4. Do you have a first name?
That’s not a name. That’s how people describe things. The Blues the Cardinals the zoo
Hey, I can’t help my name so popular

5. What’s something surprising about you that not many people know?
I’m a natural blonde.

6. Little Cindy Lou Who really did a number on your heart. How is it now?
That little wench! I am still on meds thanks to her!

7. What’s your favorite meal?
A big bowl of termite’s smothered in rotten garbage
That’s disgusting!!!
Thank You!

8. For over 50 years you have said you hated Christmas is that still true.
Wow, hit me in my feely’s on that one!!! Sure I hated Christmas in the past….. but now? ….Little bit.

9. Since you’re not a fan of Christmas, what is your favorite holiday?
Silent auctions of bankrupted Whoville houses.

10. Do you have a favorite Holiday song?
Grandma got run over by a reindeer! And I saw it happen! SMACK! Her false teeth went flying thru the air (laughs) It was fricken awesome!!!

11. Do you have a favorite all-time song?
Highway to Hell!

12. If you could ask Santa for one present, what would it be?
Who’s he?
Who’s he?? The guy who brings all the presents to good boys and girls every year!
Never heard of him. Next question
What is your family like? Do you have any siblings?
I don’t understand the question. What is a family? You can’t duplicate perfection!

13. Last question. Thank God. What are some of your hobbies and favorite things you like to do?
Crushing the dreams of children seems to be working well…. I think I’ll stick with that!

Christmas Presents Steal them
Christmas Trees Make for good bonfires
Christmas lights Love them! Put a little tinsel on them and you have a meal!

Christmas Carols Earplugs
Max your dog Great Dinner!

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